When I read Empire or Total Film I always skip the last few pages lest someone nearby sees me thumbing through the mucky ad pages and thinks I’m stealth-reading a wank pamphlet.

But the geniuses behind such ads are clearly hip to this and have created an ad that works as a rallying cry for the dirty mac brigade, but also lets over-shoulder-readers think that they may just be about to engage in an act of civic duty.

“Older ladies waiting at home to talk”.

Most people would read that and think of a lonely old dear sat at home on a Monday night, checking her carriage clock to see if it’s time for the following Sunday night’s episode of The Antiques Roadshow.

Then again, such people would have to divert their gaze from multiple ads for a wide range of bongo vids, so it’s not quite effective yet. And until it is, I will continue to be embarrassed by the last few pages of my film mags.

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